It has been said that gratitude is the mother of joy, so Mother’s Day month seems like the perfect time to practice building the gratitude habits that will allow us to commit to regularly taking time to focus on all that we are grateful for, even (and especially) when it would be much easier to focus on the inconveniences and distractions of our everyday lives.

So, how about it: What are you grateful for?

Well, I made a list… not a To-Do list, which we moms are all so adept at, but a Gratitude list, and here’s what I came up with:

• I am grateful that my daughters still think Mommy-snuggles are so special.
• I am grateful that my husband is my best friend who believes in me and my dreams.
• I am grateful for family and friends who “get me” and truly want the best for me.
• I am grateful that I can be genuinely happy for others and truly want the best for them.
• I am grateful for all of the opportunities I have created and been blessed with in my life.
• I am grateful that I always know I am loved and know that I am deserving of that love.
• I am grateful that my Dad passed along his wisdom and sense of humor.
• I am grateful for all of the new relationships that continue to bless my life, and the endless possibilities to grow, learn, and share that they bring with them.
• I am grateful for the biggest challenges that Life’s presented me, as I’ve been blessed with the ability to trustingly know each one has a meaningful purpose, even if they may come with initial pain.
• I am grateful to be able to enjoy my world with all of my senses.
• I am grateful that my children teach me more about Life every day.
• I am grateful for being able to recognize and savor those “Life is perfectly as it should be” moments of pure contentment (and that I am remembering to enjoy those moments much more often).

Of course, this is not a complete list, but it is what I feel in my heart at this moment, and tuning into these grateful feelings provides an instant boost of energy and joy.  Although gratitude is a very simple gift, it is not always easy to practice.  We all have times where we experience negative emotions, fear, anger, doubt, and the like. However, the value of gratitude is absolutely precious – since it is impossible to focus on both a thankful thought and negative thought at the same time, choosing to focus on gratitude is the fast-track to happiness, fulfillment, contentment, and hopefulness.

And, it is a gift that is topped off with all of the smiles and heartfelt warmth that it brings when it is shared freely with others!  A gift that allows us personal happiness as well as a joyful connection to others – and it is available to each of us, in limitless supply, at any time!

Happy Mother’s Month, and I am truly grateful that you are sharing this moment with me!

(This is a re-post from one I did around this time last year – I thought it was a perfect reminder for me now, and I hope you find it helpful as well!  Can you believe it is almost time for the kids to be out of school again?  It isn’t about getting it all perfect – it’s about remembering to have fun while we’re doing it – and why not feel great about including our family in the process!)

I made an “executive decision” this past week to shift gears a bit and slow down a little for the summer.  I had been super-busy the past few weeks with some business projects and work in general, and I was finding myself stressed-out, over-tired, and increasingly overwhelmed.  I had started to stray from my commitment to and philosophy of building my career and business around my desired lifestyle, rather than letting my career and business overtake my life.  It is all about balance, and I had started to slip down the slippery slope of working and e-mailing until all hours of the night, skipping the gym, not spending as much time as I would like playing with my kids during the day, multi-multi-tasking, and taking absolutely no time to focus on my own self-care.  For a brief while there, I wasn’t enjoying my work as much as usual, I wasn’t enjoying my moodiness and exhaustion, and I am sure that my family wasn’t enjoying me that much either.  To top it all off, I was feeling hypocritical because I wasn’t following my own advice – moms need to make themselves a priority in their own lives.

Then, over the course of a few days, it seemed the Universe was knocking me upside the head, like in those “I shoulda had a V-8” commercials.  I was receiving the message repeatedly (from what I was feeling, by what I was tuning into around me, by conversations I was having with other people) that I was out of alignment with my Self, my values, and my goals, and it was time for an adjustment.  So, I made a conscious choice to slow down a little, and I developed a daily “routine” that allows time for me to focus on getting my top work priorities done, uninterrupted, for an hour or so each morning and afternoon, while leaving time throughout the day to spend quality time with my kids and still leave myself some ME-Time each day.  It was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders and I could literally breathe easier.  (I once read that when we are stressed, our breathing becomes shorter and more shallow – No wonder we become exhausted!)  I have also decided to limit e-mail checking mostly to a time in the morning and one later in the day, rather than getting sucked into it every time I pass my desk.  I feel the change in me and I see it reflected in my kids.  They are content to keep themselves busy for that hour or so each morning and afternoon while I work uninterrupted (for the most part! J) because they know that they’ll have my attention for the remainder of the day.  Will this new approach always produce the perfectly balanced day – No, but it’s a definite step in the right direction for me.

I have also enlisted the kids’ help more around the house this summer – putting their own laundry away, folding towels, picking up after themselves, and their newest chore, which strangely they love (almost as much as I love them doing it!), unloading the dishwasher.  We have also made most meal preparations a family affair.  The girls love to help me cook!  I have been spending more quality time with my husband and the kids this past week, had more time to do some things for myself, and have still stayed pretty much on top of my work.  A few less things may be completed in a given timeframe, but I am enjoying my days and my work so much more again, and that is worth it to me.  I absolutely love my jobs as a mom and a business owner, and I will continue to approach balancing the two as an adjustable process that I tweak along the way so both work best for my family and me.

Most importantly, I did not beat myself up over straying from the balance I espouse to.  When I felt the scattered discomfort and noticed the shift away from balance, I chose to do something about it.  After all, there are no mistakes – only opportunities to learn and grow.

(Not me & my Dad, but absolutely captures “the look”)

The Father-Daughter dance at weddings is a time-held and beloved tradition that almost every daddy can’t help but imagine from the first time he holds his newborn baby girl in his arms! I know that I will never forget the look of love and pride I saw in my father’s eyes as his smile beamed and his eyes held back tears while we danced together on my own wedding day. And it is a memory that is ever-more precious since my Dad passed away 6 years ago. (Deep breath…, OK now.)

So with bridal season upon us, I thought I’d pay tribute to all of the Father-Daughter duos with this fun video link! (Warning: If you’re like me, any song about “Butterfly Kisses” gets me misty, so you may want a tissue handy for the first part! But be sure to keep watching past that…) Enjoy!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLUghUmDrRA&feature=related

Live Positively Fulfilled!

Lynn Ely
MomEvolve
Inspiring Moms to Evolve TM
www.momevolve.com

Want help making your Self a priority in your life? Reconnect with your Self and reduce stress when you sign up for MomEvolve’s ME-zine.

I hope you had a wonderful Easter weekend with your families – I know we sure did! The Easter Bunny was very good to us! I can’t believe Spring Break is here and summer is coming up right behind it!

How would you like to cruise into summer this year calmly, confidently, and full of energy, knowing that you are finally making the changes you have been wanting to make that will free up your mom-schedule (not to mention your mom-sanity!) for enjoying more summertime fun with family and friends?

You absolutely can, and the best part is, you don’t have to go it alone!

Starting in May, MomEvolve is offering a fun and unique monthly coaching and community membership program for moms called The ME Connection, where moms connect and evolve!

The ME Connection is more than a coaching program. It is also a mom community – a sisterhood – for, about, and in support of today’s evolving moms. It is a program and a place in your life designed to help you connect with your Self, connect with other moms like you, connect with your goals and dreams, and connect with how you want to share your unique and amazing gifts with the world!

As a member of The ME Connection, you will have convenient access to valuable yet “digestible” information that you can easily fit into your busy mom-schedule, however works best for you personally, and you will receive the support you need to make the changes you want for yourself and your family.

And, not only is The ME Connection convenient , supportive, and transformational, it also is super-reasonably priced – you can join me and other like-minded evolving moms who want to begin taking action toward their goals, all for less than the cost of a couple of large lattes a week!

Cool Beans, huh?!

(Sorry, but I couldn’t resist!)

Click here to find out all of the exciting details of The ME Connection and reserve your spot for May. I look forward to connecting with you soon!

Live Positively Fulfilled!

Lynn Ely
The Evolving Moms Coach™

MomEvolve
Inspiring Moms to Evolve™

Happy April Fool’s Day!

Looking for a last-minute April Fool’s prank or gag-gift idea? Check out this site that is all about all things April Fools:

http://www.april-fools.us/about-us.html

Have fun, and don’t be fooled!

Live Positively Fulfilled!

Lynn Ely
MomEvolve
Inspiring Moms to Evolve TM
www.momevolve.com

Want help making your Self a priority in your life? Reconnect with your Self and reduce stress when you sign up for MomEvolve’s ME-zine.

Every now and then, my daughters will ask me about the “eyes in the back of my head”. I think I must leave them wondering in amazement at times with how I can have such 20/20 vision with those rear-view eyes when they’re hidden under my hair!

Just chalk it up as one of the many magical skills of motherhood!

Along those same lines, I came across this You Tube video the other day, and I thought it would be fun to share it with my Mom-Friends. Maybe you’ve already seen it, maybe not, but it is pretty impressive how this mom squeezes all those “Momisms” into a single overture! Enjoy!!

The other night, my 6-year-old daughter said very pensively to me, “Mom, you know what’s cool about Dora? She never rushes – she just takes her time and always gets there!” After my heart about burst with love and admiration for her 6-year-old wisdom, I thought – You know, that Dora’s a pretty savvy lady!

How many of us moms rush around all day from multi-task to multi-task, and at the end of the day feel like all we’ve done is spin our wheels with almost no “progress” to show for it? Or, in reference to longer-term goals – How often have we set a goal for ourselves, only to give up in frustration when we didn’t arrive at our “destination” with the unrealistic warp-speed we desire?

Not Dora! No Ma’am! She takes time to smell the roses and enjoys the celebration of overcoming no less than three potentially journey-stopping obstacles along the way. She seeks out the opportunity – whether it involves climbing over it, working around it, or asking for help. And, as she keeps her “eye on the prize”, even Swiper’s interruptions and distractions don’t derail her. Not only that, she remains polite and happy, without a single profanity-ridden tirade or “Wh’always Me” along the way!

She revisits her goal (“Where are we going…..?) and boosts her own and her co-travelers’ confidence (“We know that we can do it!”) throughout the entire journey, and before you know it, she’s reached her destination with a smile and a song.
Does she put a lot of undue and unrealistic pressure on herself? Does she beat herself up if she makes a wrong turn? Does she let it devalue her self-worth when Swiper, giants, and trolls aren’t always the kindest in their reception of her efforts? Nope!

She just keeps on moving forward at a pace and style that best serve her in getting there. Most importantly, she takes time to enjoy the journey!

Dora is a great example of how we can’t always foresee all of the opportunities and/or challenges we may face as we set out to complete a task or move toward a goal – so why put that expectation, concern, and pressure on ourselves? We don’t necessarily have to have everything planned out perfectly, from A to Z and every step in between, before we can begin moving forward. Rather, we can choose to just get started, to focus on and act in the moment at hand (since really, that’s all we can effectively respond to anyway), and to embrace the purpose of that moment in our journey, even if we may not quite understand completely how it fits into the bigger plan just yet.

And when we do make a “wrong turn” or “encounter a mountain”, does that mean our journey has to end or that we shouldn’t have embarked on it in the first place? What if we look at those challenges as opportunities, and choose to believe that we are exactly where we are meant to be at that moment – because there are no mistakes, only opportunities to learn, grow, and decide how to move forward from there.

We can choose to have fun and trust that we will get there at a time that is perfectly right for us, and who knows – maybe there’ll even be a cute little insect mariachi band tooting their horns for us in celebration when we arrive!

Live Positively Fulfilled!

Lynn Ely
MomEvolve
Inspiring Moms to Evolve TM
www.momevolve.com

About 1 ½ years ago, my husband and I decided to move our family from Florida to South Carolina, largely due to wanting to be closer to my oldest brother’s family who lives in North Carolina.  He and his wife have twin daughters close to our daughters’ ages, and my husband and I wanted our girls to grow up close to family, similar to how we both did as kids.  Since our move, we have spent pretty much every major holiday (and even many of the not-so-major ones) together with them, and seeing all four of the girls beam with joy every time they are together reminds us of just how perfect our decision to move was for us.  Close family relationships, for us, are an utmost priority in our life, so we followed our hearts, took the plunge, and made our move – and we haven’t regretted it for one moment since we did!  Watching our daughters Trick-or-Treating this past weekend with their cousins, and my husband and I getting to enjoy time with my brother and his wife, are priceless memories for us all! 

When my Dad suddenly became ill six years ago and soon only had days to live, Life reminded me in one of the most blatant and obvious, although also toughest, ways that every moment is precious and not to waste even one.  So I try to build my life around what I value most, and try to focus each day on enjoying the moment at hand.  That moment is gone in a flash, and I want to be able to look back on it with a smile and gratitude, and to say that I lived it to the fullest, just like my Dad.  For me, this is one of the most wonderful legacies and lessons I can share with my daughters, and it is my personal road map to a life filled with love, joy, contentment, and laughter.  That, for me, is a life well-lived!

What do you value most, and how are you honoring those things that are most important to you each day?

For most families, spending quality time together is one of their most valued priorities.  Yet, with everyone’s busy schedules taking family members in all different directions on a daily basis, it often seems one of the most difficult priority items to accomplish.  If spending quality time together each night is a non-negotiable value for your family, then it is important that each family member, especially the parents, fully commit to making it happen.  One of the best ways for parents to model the importance of family time, is by shutting off work when they walk through the front door at night (or when they break for dinner, if working from home), at least until the kids are tucked into bed.  Being totally present with your children shows them they are your top priority during that time of your day together, and you’ll all enjoy it much more than stolen, agitated moments between e-mails and cell phone calls.

Also, try to avoid spending your family time always doing things side-by-side, such as watching television or playing video games together.  Rather, try mixing it up a little with activities that more fully engage everyone – do a family puzzle or craft, play charades, plan a puppet or talent show, make-up a “round-robin” narrated story where each person takes a turn adding a sentence at a time, create a “_(Name)_ Family Adventure Book” where you record pictures and memorabilia from every day family experiences and triumphs, as well as family vacations and celebrations.  The possibilities are endless, so explore what appeals most to your own family and involve everyone in the process of choosing what to do.  Most importantly, use that time together to really connect – discuss what went well and not-so-well in everyone’s day, inquire about school activities and friends, share dreams, express concerns, learn what’s on each others’ minds.  Family quality time provides the perfect opportunity for recognizing, validating, and celebrating each family member’s unique gifts.  From the youngest to the oldest, each family member has their own life experiences and lessons to share, from which the entire family can learn and grow.  So, make the commitment, be creative, and enjoy some family time today!

“The present moment holds the key to liberation.” – Eckhart Tolle

I read an article recently about how when we stop longing for something to happen, that’s when it usually does happen.  I was instantly reminded of when my husband and I were trying to get pregnant with our first child.  We had been trying for almost two years with no success.  The only thing I knew in my heart I always wanted more than anything else in my life was to be a mother, and the fact that it wasn’t happening, and with no apparent physical explanation, was frustrating, disappointing, confusing, and truly heartbreaking.  To make matters worse, it seemed that practically every week brought the announcement of another friend who was blissfully (and easily!) pregnant.  I remember trying to remain positive and share genuine happiness and joy over their news, but at the same time fighting back tears because it wasn’t me.  Our lives had been “reduced” to counting days on the calendar, tracking my temperature, “mandatory” conception attempts, and one disappointing pregnancy test after another.  I was stressed beyond belief, and I finally decided I’d had enough.  I needed a break from the entire process!

Coincidentally, I made the decision to take a break from it all on the last day of a vacation my husband and I were on.  Without realizing it, I had dropped the weight of the world off my shoulders for a moment, and allowed for the first bit of spontaneity in a very long time.  That was all it took – we were instantly pregnant!

Looking back, I think what really occurred was that I had previously allowed myself to sink into a victim-level energy and its accompanying way of thinking – Why me?  Why was everyone else getting pregnant and not us?  What was wrong with me?  Maybe I didn’t deserve it for some reason?  All of my thoughts were focused on lack and my inability to have what I wanted so badly.  I then made the conscious choice to no longer live as a victim of my circumstances, and in doing so, I stopped chasing so desperately after something I was lacking as a piece that would complete me.  Literally, almost at the moment I decided to let it go and just accept and enjoy what was, I was delivered the gift I had been seeking.  By living in and embracing the moment, rather than chasing after something in my future to complete me, I shifted my energy and regained the power to live my life, instead of waiting for my life to happen to me – that made all the difference!