You’ve done it, I’ve done it, we’ve all done it. Every mom I know has forgotten to pack a special bag-lunch for a field trip, or not realized it was a no-uniform day, or missed a class party, or overlooked some other detail as we try to keep it all straight between our work and family lives.

Every mom I know has also allowed herself to be eaten up by guilt, as she easily convinced herself that she was the only non-super mom on the planet.

The interesting thing about mom-guilt is this: while we are sick to our stomachs for days, lamenting over haunting thoughts of how we have somehow scarred our kids for life, they have already moved on and let it go. By lunchtime, they have forgotten all about the fact that Mom forgot to send in the empty paper towel roll and they had to use one of the “spares” that the teacher preparedly had on-hand.

Of course, they may conveniently remind us of our erred ways every now and then, but one of the most beautiful things about children is that they love us unconditionally. They truly want mommy to be happy.

As moms, we need to realize and be okay with the fact that, with all of the many balls we simultaneously juggle, we may drop one occasionally. It is simply a fact of modern motherhood.

We don’t lay awake at night worrying ourselves sick over other facts of Life. The world is round. The sky is blue. Moms sometimes make mistakes.

Why not just accept that fact? You are an amazing mom and you will make a few mistakes along the way. Period. No self-torment necessary.

Acknowledge your mistakes, learn from them, vow to do things in a way that feels better next time, and move on to loving yourself just as much anyway. Your kids surely do!

After my youngest daughter had a totally uncharacteristic, overly-tired-inspired toddler-style meltdown to the nth degree last night before bedtime, I got her calmed down and tucked into bed with a smile, full of hugs, and “I love you Mommy”s.  We discussed how it is O.K. to be frustrated or grumpy, but not to let that turn into a full-on one person scream-fest.  We also discussed how when we are getting carried away by those strong emotions, especially when we are really over-tired or really upset, that the little voice in our head isn’t always 100% honest with us, so we need to stop, take a deep breath, and ask, “How true is what that little voice is telling me, really?” For example, when she was super-upset and she said everyone was ignoring her and nobody cared about her, she could say, “Wait a second, I may feel sad or angry right now, but I know that isn’t true – my family always loves me and I never need to worry about that, no matter what I am thinking or feeling.”  I reassured her that the one thing she can always count on and never have to question or worry about is that her family, every one of us, absolutely loves her and wants her to be with us and happy.  She decided next time it would be better to come and tell me how she is feeling so I can “snuggle her grumpies away” before she lets them get her so wound up.

I left the room feeling pretty good that we had turned the situation around into such a positive and helpful discussion – score one for the “Feeling Like A Good Mom” column!  But wait, things got even better… This morning (way too early for a Sunday, as with most Sunday morning snuggle-visits), she came in our room to snuggle as her back-to-sweetness, lovable, adorable little self.  She said she was feeling all better and went on to share her always wise beyond her years “old soul” wisdom with me.  She said, “Mommy, it’s all right to cry because crying gets what is feeling sad out of your heart and then you can feel all fresh inside and your heart can get back to what it does best – feeling happy.”

Straight from the mouths of babes!  Such pure, sweet, simple wisdom – that is why I am in my master bathroom (so as not to wake up Daddy with his cold) standing at the counter as my desk at 6:00 AM on a Sunday morning writing all of this down.  Some gifts are much too precious to risk losing or letting fade by not capturing them and holding onto them right away!  So I share my daughter’s gift to me with you.  And the best gifts are often those you share most freely because they are so much a part of who you are that they just flow through you to others.  (Thank you for sharing your gift with Mommy this morning, my littlest Sweetheart!)

So, if you need to, have a good cry every now and then – hopefully minus the “thought you were having a limb amputated” wails we witnessed at our house last night – but an honest to goodness heart-felt cry that is right for you.  Let the sadness, the frustration, the anger, the hurt, the fear, and all of the self-doubts out, so your tears can help release those things and wash them away.  Then your heart can get back to doing what if does best – loving your Self and your life, and feeling grateful for all of the wonderful people and gifts you are blessed with each day.